When I was a freshman in high school, I was found out for the fraud that I was.

I couldn’t ride a bicycle.

Yes, I could drive a car, but couldn’t stay on a bike for more than two seconds. I could have learned when I was a youngster, like the rest of the human population, but I’m a firm believer that if something is hard, just quit.

But that fateful day my house of cards came crumbling down.

My friend Elijah and I were dropped off at his sister’s house – a few miles away from his parents’ house. We played basketball and did other things that adolescent boys do – I’m almost positive fart jokes were involved. His sister eventually left, and he suggested going back to his parents’ house.

That’s an awful long walk, I said.

Then he brought up the idea that crushed my spirit and sent me into damage control.

“We have a couple of bikes, we could just take them over to my place.”

Shit.

It was a simple solution to a trivial problem. But I didn’t know how to ride a bike. As a 15-year-old.

He wheeled out a pair of bicycles and I was forced to think on my feet.

Oh, we can wait until your sister gets home.

How about we play another game of basketball?

Does this seat seem high? It seems high.

I tried to ride it a few times, but always ended up falling seconds later.

Man, it’s been forever since I’ve rode a bike, I said, trying to attribute my inability to rust – and contradicting the well-known adage of “It’s like riding a bike.”

My years of living a lie were coming to an end. Elijah was connecting the dots.

“Oh my God,” he said with a disbelieving smile. “Do you not know how to ride a bike??”

There was shame. There was embarrassment. There was crippling fear.

On that multi-mile trek back to his parents’ house, he slowly rode his bike next to me while I jogged. Perhaps to the outside world, it would look like we just had one bike, but I knew. He knew.

I became a punching bag of mockery for all of my friends.

The bright side? If I wouldn’t have been found out, there’s a chance my future wife would tell me to teach my future child how to ride.

I would gulp in fear and dart my eyes around in a panic.

Dang, does this seat seem high? It seems high.

You know, I haven’t rode a bike in so long.